Planning for the Inevitable: Part #3
Posted on August 30, 2014 by bob in MoneyWise
While finances are an important aspect of our lives, we are more than an accumulation of financial accounts and material resources. In preparing for our inevitable day of departure from this life, we can make it easier for our loved ones to manage the events following our departure by providing them with certain non-financial information. This month we will talk about three categories of information to guide your family and friends when you are gone.
1. Funeral Services/Burial Arrangements
Among the matters to be decided are: what funeral home to use, what clothing and jewelry you will wear; whether the casket will be open or closed; whether you wish to be buried or cremated; if you will be buried, what cemetery, plot or mausoleum, and what kind of marker do you wish to have. Since these decisions may have financial consequences, pre-arranging these services while your health is good and paying for them in advance makes good sense.
You also need to make known to your family if you wish to be an organ donor, since prompt action is required to make this decision effective.
With regard to your funeral or memorial service, your loved ones will benefit from your input on the following: where you want the service (church, funeral home chapel, graveside, combination); what minister and other speakers you wish to conduct your service; military participation; participation by a fraternal organization; do you want flowers or donations to a charity in lieu of flowers (if charity, what charity?); what music and musicians would you like to include; particular passages of Scripture, poetry or other readings you want in the ceremony; whom you want to serve as pallbearers.
2. Obituary
There is no law against writing your own ahead of time. Helpful information includes: the names of your parents; your place and date of birth; the date of your marriage and name of your spouse (especially helpful if your spouse predeceased you or may be incapacitated); information about your education, military service, career, community service, church, club or other memberships; what photo to include, if you want one; the names of close family members who preceded you in death and those who survive you. Finally, indicate the newspapers in which you want your obituary to appear.
3. Personal Property
Many wills contain language indicating that personal property will be divided in an equitable manner among a group of heirs. Often the will states that a separate written instrument may exist, assigning particular items to particular people. When such a list does not exist, disputes among the heirs about Aunt Susie’s sewing box or Granny Smith’s apple pie pan are more likely to arise. Please do your heirs a favor by spelling out your wishes ahead of time. If you do not, you risk creating a lasting legacy of strife among your heirs, unless they are unusually self-controlled and mild mannered.
And speaking of writing things down, that is a very good practice with regard to the first and second categories of information above. Memory is fallible, even among people with the best of intentions. Unless your information and wishes are written down, someone will misremember something you said. To avoid a disagreement between John and Mary about whether you wanted Thomas Taylor or Taylor Thomas to sing at your memorial service, take a few minutes and write it down. They will remember you more fondly for making the effort to ease their burdens.
Alan Wallace
Alan Wallace, CFA, ChFC, CLU is a Senior Financial Advisor for Ronald Blue & Co.’s Montgomery office, www.ronblue.com/location-al. He can be reached at 334-270-5960, or by e-mail at alan.wallace@ronblue.com.
